I’ve fully entered into my new season here. It’s scary because I literally only have my faith and a few friends to lean on, everything else has been taken away.
I find myself getting tugged back and forth between being caught up in the beauty of creation and my own flooding emotions. I look around me and everything is so beautiful yet I find moments where the tears just stream down my face only hoping God is watching and catching them. The pain I had yesterday is not reflected in today.
Today is a different kind of pain. Yesterday was the pain of the past and doing everything to be okay and live normally. Today’s pain is a pain that I know will not return to me. Today’s pain is caused by simple revelations of having to move forward.
Move foward in a way I never had to before. So again I ask myself th question: where am I?
I’m cleared of all negativity and set backs however, I’m broken. I know who my God is and that is just about the only thing that makes sense. Outside of that I am confused. That is my natural human reaction even though my spirit tells me to look at God and the characteristics he holds and how confusion is not one of them. So I turn away from my confusion and I trust in the truth that God does all things for a reason and he is a unique God who does things his way and not according to common logic but according to what we need. Somethings only he knows.
Pray for what you need. If you are lacking faith pray for it. If you are craving to walk in your purpose, pray for alignment. If you are in need of money for bills-pray for provision. If your soul needs healing, God’s got you pray for it. I do warn you that when you pray for these things it might hurt at first but remember in the chaos he is still God and he knows what you need and to fully receive what we need sometimes we need to be positioned for it.
He is able.
He is faithful.
He is on the throne.